Going to try to blog

I am going to try to start blogging again. Probably not daily. It hurts too much to type. At least once or twice a week though maybe I will post something. But I am questioning that. It might be better if I disappear from the internet. The internet is the only contact I have with anyone really now so if I can disappear from online then no one will have to deal with me anymore. No one should have to deal with me. I am harmful. The negative vibrations I put off into the universe are harmful to everyone. The best thing I could do for the world was to cease to exist. I wish I knew how. I cannot end my life. I cannot end my pain. I am trapped. I have lost hope. I am torn between the loneliness and the need to protect others.